Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Advice for stupid hippies

Step one: Lead by example. Get married or cohabit as soon as you can, and then stay married, for the good of the planet. But please make sure you don't have any children, because they're bad for the environment. And of course you're going to have to live in poverty, because consumption will destroy the Earth.

Step two: Get everyone else to do the same. This is going to be tough, since your miserable condition will be pretty obvious. I would recommend being really shrill, and endlessly prophesying doom for non-believers (you know, like the religious nuts you hated in high school), but you guys seem to have this down pretty well already. So really, it's all about step one for now. Start by giving away the computer which you are currently using to read this-- they can be as bad for global warming as an SUV.

Of course, I won't be joining you. Not that there's anything wrong with what you're doing, but it's just not my lifestyle. I was born this way. Don't judge me.

--FABULOUS J

2 comments:

Unknown said...

Absolutely loved the "stay married" link. Thanks for sharing.
I am a little bummed that I couldn't get the "children" one to work - will try later.

I decided that you are going to be my link to world politics. I can't stand reading about it from anyone else. They all just get a little too serioius for my taste.

If you are looking for a good topic, I would love to hear your take on solving immigration issues in US. In fact, maybe you could make that your dissertation. LG and I haven't been able to come up with a solution yet, and he told me to see what you think.

the House of Payne said...

Well, Alice, I am honored. Maybe I can write something up on immigration, but I think the truth of the matter is that there is no policy option left to us at this point that will not make a lot of people really upset. This is why we're stuck with our current policy, even though almost everyone agrees it is broken.