Thursday, March 24, 2011

A year and a half of movies

Well, it's been a while since I did any blogging. And even longer since I did movie reviews.

Frankly, I have not gone to see a lot of movies in the last year. I've been pretty busy. And some people think it's a stupid idea to go to the movies, anyway.

But this week I might go catch a flick with the princesa de poder, so I thought this might be a good time to take a look back.

Here you go!

* * Cloudy with a chance of meatballs : Saw this on a plane, and it was a welcome distraction. Also, Bruce Campbell is in the voice cast.

* * * * Invictus : Matt Damon's Boer accent was fun, Morgan Freeman was perfect, and the whole thing was pretty inspiring. An excellent example of Sports Movie Type 3. (Underdogs triumph over favored team, racism.)

* * * Sherlock Holmes : Also known as Iron Man and Gigolo Joe in: Steampunk London: Part 1: The Adventure Begins. Delightful. And when is Robert Downey Jr. going to be on House as Hugh Laurie's long-lost illegitimate son?

* * * How to train your dragon : I would give this four stars, except for one thing. Why do all the adult vikings have Scottish accents? And why do all the kid vikings have American accents? I want them all to sound like the Swedish Chef.

* * * * Babies : Look! Babies! Look at their chubby cheeks! Adorable! Oh! The things we do with ease, they do with difficulty! So cute! I can't stand it! (Would get five stars, but the parents selected to represent America are braindead filthy hippies.)

* * * * * Toy Story 3 : Pixar, when will you disappoint me? George Lucas is dead to me. Peter Jackson has one giant-sized strike. But Pixar just makes me happy.

* Year One : Saw it on a plane. Made me want to jump out.

* * * Tangled : A fun little flick, and better than I expected from Disney. In particular, I loved the non-human characters. That horse and chameleon should have their own show.

* * Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 1 : Too much teenage wangst. But, better than the book.

* * * * * True Grit : This belongs in a very exclusive club of remakes that improved upon the original. Thank you, Coen Brothers. Thank you, Dude. Thank you, America.

--JAY FABULOUS

5 comments:

Kam said...

hey john, it's been awhile since I've looked in on your blog... and looks like it's been awhile since you last wrote. Loved your movie reviews... I've actually seen some of them, and want to see some of them after reading your ratings. Loved Invictus, and Toy Story 3. Although, I couldn't get into Babies... needed some talking, I guess. I turned it off halfway through. But it could be that I have that same ol, same ol going on around here all the time, eh?

Anyway, good reviews. Thanks!

Randi said...

I had the same complaint about How to Train Your Dragon! The accents drove me bonkers. I kept waiting for a caber toss scene, but it never came.

True Grit was amazing. I watched the Coen brothers version, and then watched the original a week later. I think they should posthumously revoke John Wayne's Oscar and give it to Jeff Bridges.

For me there is one smirch on Pixar's otherwise great name: A Bug's Life. Booooo-ring. Except for the fat caterpillar. I loved him, even if he does make the long list of "fat and stupid" Disney characters even longer. At least he's not "fat and evil." Another long list.

Invictus: pretty good. Probably would have liked it more if I gave a crap about rugby.

Sherlock Holmes: Sigh...Jude Law.

Harry Potter: Loved it. Not as good as the one Cuaron directed, but still great.

I am excited the see Babies. It's in my Netflix queue. Can't wait.

I love your movie reviews, Juanito. Keep 'em comin'!

the House of Payne said...

Kam: Yeah, I think if you have real babies the movie version is probably less exciting.

RJ: The funniest thing about the accents in HTTYD is that the whole movie I was thinking that if they were going to do Scots accents at least they could have got someone who didn't sound so ridiculously phony. Then I looked at the credits: Gerard Butler and Craig Ferguson. Uh...

Also, I know I didn't just hear you say something bad about John Wayne, right? Because that man was like, America personified. And his acting in the original was a revelation. It was like a whole new John Wayne. I mean, he had an eyepatch and everything.

Your dislike of Bug's Life is more forgivable. It's only my fourth favorite remake of Seven Samurai. But I do love the two foreign-speaking pill bugs, even more than the fat caterpillar.

And you're going to love Babies. The Mongolian kid in particular is going to make your cheek-pinching fingers itchy.

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