Movie reviews: 2015, the year in review edition

Okay, so it hasn't been quite a year since the last movie reviews post, but I'm going to go ahead and jump in anyway.

Why? Because my lady is at the grocery store and the boys are asleep. And I don't have anything else to do. Apparently.

Ant-Man : * * * * 1/2

Soooooo fun. The science is completely inconsistent and silly even for a comic book movie, but I enjoyed the heck out of this flick. The Thomas the Tank Engine sequence perfectly encapsulates everything that makes this movie tick: thrilling action, light-hearted comedy, believable characters, and a blithe disregard for the immutable laws of physics.

For the first ten minutes of the movie, I wasn't sure about Paul Rudd. He reminded me of Ryan Reynolds in Green Lantern in all the wrong ways. But I ended liking his Scott Lang almost as much as his Brian Fantana or Bobby Newport. The real scene stealer, though, was Michael Peña as Luis. Hilarious!  Every line he delivered was pure gold.

Bottom line: Even though both the last episode of Lost and the last 200 hours or so of The Hobbit greatly depleted my reservoir of like for Evangeline Lilly, I still can't wait to see Ant-Man and the Wasp.


The Martian : * * * 1/2

Not nearly as good as the book, but still very good. And Matt Damon was much better than I expected. I completely believed him (and liked him) as an astronaut. Not so much Jessica Chastain. Removing her from this movie entirely would bump it up at least a half star. Maybe a whole star. The same for the execrable two minute epilogue at the end. Blecch.

Hey and Michael Peña again! And he was great! Boy am I ready to see everything else that guy is in. Hollywood, take note.


Star Wars: The Force Awakens : * * * *

Yeah, this is pretty much a remake of the original in lots of ways, but who cares. It's a pastiche, an homage, and it comes from a place of love (and fanboi squee).  So yay Han and Chewie flying the Millenium Falcon!  Yay tough old Grandma Princess Leia! Yay emo Kylo Ren!  Yay Finn and Rey and BB-8!  Yay stormtrooper Daniel Craig! Yay Star Wars!

But just to prove I am not just enraptured to be reliving my childhood, booooo pretty much all the CGI aliens. Especially that refugee from the Hobbit heptalogy Maz Kanata. Booooo. In addition to looking awful, Yoda she is not. And booooooooo Supreme Leader Snoke. Seriously, that is the worst villain name in the history of the universe.

Anyway, that's all for now. Until next time, my imaginary readers, feel free to form your own opinions about movies.

I will correct you later if you are wrong.

--ULTIMO DIAZ